You might be one of "them if...
• The rent going up is a good thing.• "Lost the remote" means filing a missing persons report.
• News that your teenager dented the Maybach is met with "Which one?"
• "Buying a Dell" means an entire county in Ireland.
• Depth charts for the Panama canal cause you to change you boating plans.
• When informed on your yacht "The crew are revolting" you reply "Yes but at least they aren't unionizing."
• The rent going up is a good thing.
Best entertain me with suggestions in the comments lest I throw a tantrum for being ignored.
20 comments:
- You never talk to the help.
- And not just because you can't remember all their names.
- And not just because you don't share a common language.
- You never book your own vacations.
- And not just because you can't remember all your vacation homes.
- And not just because your jet is always standing by.
- You never pour yourself a drink.
- And not just because you can't remember where your kitchen is.
- And not just because you have a dedicated drink pourer.
- And not just because she's in a bikini.
- And not just because she's got 50 friends.
- And not just because your real estate agent said your pool needed proper staging.
Bitching that premium gas is not falling as much as regular.
The Mahi Mahi is still a little pink inside.
Wal-Mart is just another thrift store.
New Cadillac is the maids car.
What's a dollar bill?
Your first paycheck of the calendar year is smaller than the rest because of that pesky FICA.
You write a million dollar check for a 100 Grand Bar and threaten to call the police if you don't get $900k in change.
Can't we write of my three new mansions on a reality show with the new wife and her friends?
Anyone know which continent I left the Bugatti on?
Which Bugatti?
The one with the diamond crusted gas cap! GEE!
Your outdoor pool has floodgates and generates power for your guest cottages.
Your guest cottages have their own guest cottages, so your guests can bring guests.
Your guests' guests' cottages are linked by an underground railway system. There should be no reason for you to mingle with your guests' guests. That's a bit like talking to the help.
Your idea of a food riot is being served "CHÂTEAU LAFITE, 1787" with Kobe beef. White wine with steak? Hilarious!
Your private residence is visible from space except because of your stake in Google it isn't visible from space.
Hahaha!
Your idea of getting your hands dirty involves counting the money. Not you personally of course. A simple nod to one of your many assistants should suffice. (Once again, there should be no need to talk to the help.)
Your idea of a natural disaster is the river near the 18th green.
And then there's that damn bunker near the 18th green! Fighting in the sand? In a depression? Oh bloody hell! What hardships!
Normally I'd laugh but I just got back from a round and scored a 9 on the final hole.
Wait, I shouldn't say anything that might make people suspect I might be one of those.
Rob Dawg,
Any way you slice it, I think you are off the hook. I definitely don't suspect that you might be one of those.
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Your idea of a fair game involves at least 8 mulligans on the final hole.
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Hahaha! :)
It was Zeno's golf game. Third shot on the fringe of the green. Fourth 18 inches failed pitch. Fifth perfect pitch only to roll last the hole and off the green acellerating. Sixth stuck to three putt.
If you have a beer cooler on the back of you golf cart and your clubs tied to the front like a deer, You might not be one of them.
Rob Dawg,
It was Zeno's golf game.
Did you get Achilles tendonitis? Did the country club try to appease you with a warm and delightful tortoise soup? If so, which wine was served? White or red?
Think carefully before answering. You could be one of "them"!
If you buy and sell governments for some excitement (profit) in your portfolio.
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