Thursday, April 20, 2006

A Real MFer

Imagine those mile upon mile tracts in Palmdale, Riverside and Phoenix when the first REO breaks down values 40%. The other banks won’t care that 40% off of the highest price only compares to a few of all homes and they won’t care that interest rates also ate 20% of the equivalent price. What they’ll care is that on the books every single mortgage in the entire development is seriously underwater. I’m going to embark on a new career; Mortgage Falcon, MF if you prefer . I will circle overhead watching the lemmings. I’ll visit the County Recorders Office and Assesors Office making sure there aren’t any liens or tax arears. I’ll fly over the houses, looking for garage conversions and cable disconnections and brown lawns. I’ll look for the signs of “going out in style,” the New Tundra and LS450 in the driveway, moving vans, Garage Sales, FSBO ads. And every week I’ll circle down and land on the arm of a banker and wisper in his ear. He’ll reward me with a chunk of flesh from the latest kill. It’ll get so I’m famous. The neighbors will see me and call out in appreciation “Hey! MF! (Mortgage Falcon)” and I’ll continue my patrol, keeping the worlds financial system safe for all mankind.


Chuck Ponzi said...

Hey Robert,

How's it going up there in Ventura. I saw a post you made over at Patrick's blog and wondered if I could copy it and comment on?

Any problems with that?

surfer-x said...

You certainly are a real MF'r, Robert - A real stupid MF'r.

You and your bloated, bong huffing boomer buddies need to just die, along with your hideous spawn. I've been bouncing from one shitty little rental to another dragging my pissed off wife and dying cats for years on end, with no end in sight.

The houses I can afford I wouldn't live in - the types my parents live in. It's f*cking disgusting, man, and below what a top-tier intellect like me deserves.

This market neeeds to just crash and you and your kind need to just hand over the keys to those of us that deserve to take our rightful places in your homes.

We've earned it, godammit.

Rob Dawg said...

Oh surfer-x, you are a hoot. Cole Kenny over at boy in the big housing bubble is your soulmate. Perhaps you can get togehter and between the two of you buy the house you deserve. If it is any consolation my estimate is that my praedialian manse is scheduled to go from somewhere near $1.4m to $850k or so. I've been waking up every morning for the last 11 years $200 richer and it was getting boring. Now I can wake up every morning and spin the wheel of morality to see if I lose eithe $50 or $150. Much more exciting. Wasn't my money on the way up won't be mine getting flushed into the great los angeles basin either.

But I'm not a boomer, I'm a cusper. Too old to be Gen X too young to be part of the herd. Vent all you want, toss labels around if it makes you feel better but think honestly before calling anyone stupid. Stupid isn't disagreeing nor is it being in different circumstance. The only reason you bother with my drecj is because it isn't stupid. Besides, com'on, little smile?, admit it, you laughed at the "Hey! MF!" comment.

Rob Dawg said...

John Doe,
No problems at all with reposting. Give me a link so I can see it. I'm not always right but I am always open to learn. Besides my rule is to only post stuff I wouldn't mind seeing repeated elsewhere.

Ventura is currently weightless, like at the top of a rollercoaster. So many things are about to happen it gets tiring just waiting. The biggest news is Adams Canyon going down to a well deserved defeat and the continuing infiltration of the New Urbanists into the fabic of land use discussions at every level. I'll post on Adams soon and the NURB invasion this weekend maybe. So many targets so few bullets.

incessant_din said...

Well done on the new handle. You know it's good when you get a response like that one from Surfer-X. Too bad those boomers and his social caste prevent him from rising to the level he deserves. Oh well, at least he has a computer, so I guess he's doing alright.

There's a quote from the Governator that comes to mind... but I'll resist.

Chuck Ponzi said...


It's nothing bad. I actually agree with some of what you said (in that post). Although I have found myself disagreeing with many things I have read you write lately, I just don't like to dwell on the negative. Gives me a bad day.


h said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Hey Robert you chose the wrong bird. Falcon's don't circle overhead. Hawks, Vultures, and sometimes Eagles do.

Rob Dawg said...

Mortgage Eagle doesn't roll of the tongue like MFer.