Tuesday, May 15, 2007

What About Me?


Funniest post at C|NET so far. Only the EN insiders will appreciate though.

What about me?
Reader post by: Nigel Swaby
Posted on: May 14, 2007, 4:34 PM PDT
Story: Casey Serin: The world's most hated blogger?

I'm quite honestly fed up with all the media exposure that Serin is getting. I am an AWARD WINNING blogger from Salt Lake City and many people link to me as authoritative.

My success in Real Estate and Olympic Pin Sales have brought me untold riches and it is me who should be held up by the press as a role model.

Just today I was sitting in my expansive garden. I gazed into the 28,000 gallon pond with koi (which are fish)in it and I said to myself, "Nigel, you have everything anyone could want. You have a BMW, you have 12 blogs, you have a POOL... IN YOUR HOUSE; What more could you really want in life?"

Later, when I was sitting in my professionally designed kitchen, I leaned against the high grade counter top and the answer came to me... I want to be just like Casey Serin. Even the love of the entire Jamaican Bobsled Team cannot fill the void in my heart.

I have seen many things in my life. I have met Ziggy Marley, for Christ sake. I have worn the finest leatherette and doused my body in the fancy body spray. I have deleted many comments and I am stickier than any of you will ever know- but I have never had the love of the media.

WHAT ABOUT ME?
----

Good work. Please claim authorship in the comments. Please note, no reimbursements for keyboards or monitors will be accepted at this time.

67 comments:

Anonymous said...

First and Murst!

unbelievable said...

Not first

I am a looser

unbelievable said...

and a Haterz

GameOver said...

That was beautiful. Props to the Hater™ who claims it!

(Kind of sounds like Flailing to me)

Legion said...

LMAO, gotta be flailing....

bemused guy said...

MOIST!
That was hilarious. Well done and I can't wait to see who did it!

Uzbecki Durak said...

Not about Nigel, but still CNet...

Casey had HIS MOTHER cosign the corporate line of credit? Great, now his parents are probably going to end up losing their house too...

The verdict is now definitively in: Psychopath.

flailing forward said...

Twasn't me. I think it was NGB. He's got a great rant about Golden Medallion on his blog with the NAR's new hit song.

LOL said...

Tears of laughter and joy are streaming down my face right now.

sid_finster said...

THAT ANSWERS IT!

Even in this day of relaxed lending standards, I could not figger out who or what would loan money to KC-Corp.

This also reveals the identity of Casey's "financial backing with good credit".

Anonymous said...

Nigel is a Mommy's Girl.

LOL said...

Posted by the CNET guy

"She was suspicious when Casey packed his toothbrush and laptop for what was supposed to be a brief drive to go bike riding"


LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

Ogg the Caveman said...

Unrelated: Flip This House is even more fake than I thought.

mejustme said...

The sad thing is his mother is now on the hook for several thousand dollars, probably at a high rate of interest with inevitable late fees and penalties, for which she has nothing to show.

He should've just asked her to lend him the money for the rent; it would've been cheaper for her to take it out of her savings. But that wouldn't be enough to fund a jaunt to Lake Tahoe.

How do you like how he lied so blatantly about the trip! He usually lies by omission or by misleading; this was an out-and-out bald-faced lie. I think it was W2-Girl who brought up the issue of toothbrushes and toiletries at IAFF; she was right on the money. He was going all along!

This article — and especially the follow-up — really make him look bad. In seven months he has gone from looking like a hapless guy with good intentions but bad luck to an evil, lying con man who will do whatever he can to feed his lazy wheatgrass habit. File under sour media.

The Dude said...

This topic is WAY too funny! I just bought a house, but didn't get a pond with fish and stuff....I am a looser.
On a follow-up note....once again, EN beats the mainstream media to the story:
Mosquito Problem in Sacramento

Ogg the Caveman said...

Also: http://www.flipthislawsuit.com/2007/04/16/anyone-purchased-armando-montelongos-real-estate-package/

Easy money always draws the bottom-feeders.

Legion said...

@Ogg

I watched those 4 money brubbing con artists for like...ooooh, maybe half an episode. They wre putting the hard sell on some old ladies "We already have an offer on this piece of shit house, so if you want it, you better grab it"

The head brother is a total scumbag, and his wife reminds me of Galina (shallow and entitled). After I read about how practically all of the realtors in their area refuse to work with them..well, enough said I guess.

Anonymous said...

http://consumerist.com/consumer/foreclosure/when-will-casey-serin-pay-for-embodying-the-worst-of-the-housing-bubble-burst-260577.php

Joe said...

"How do you like how he lied so blatantly about the trip! He usually lies by omission or by misleading; this was an out-and-out bald-faced lie. I think it was W2-Girl who brought up the issue of toothbrushes and toiletries at IAFF; she was right on the money. He was going all along!"

I very clearly remember her asking Casey about toothbrushes and stuff. She asked "was it a good hotel? Did they give them to you for free? Or did you brought them from home?"

W2-Girl = GALINA?!?

Aspeth said...

Someone claimed it yesterday afternoon. I thought it was Flailing, also.

Aspeth said...

Wow...that pic is just....wow.

Rob Dawg said...

The picture yes! Someone noticed the picture. Can someone photoshop a little BMW logo on the front?

Ogg the Caveman said...

@ Legion:

I have to admit that these shows are a bit of a guilty pleasure for me. It's like a weekly game of "spot the bullshit". I prefer whichever one features these "professionals" because then it's con artists loosing™ their shirts instead of ordinary folks who got sucked into the hype.

One thing I have definitely noticed is that some of them (invariably the ones that come across as nicer, more trustworthy, and less ruthless) have a regular contractor that shows up on most jobs. Others seem to be scrambling to find new people every time. It's almost as if nobody wants to work with them.

segfault said...

Really funny that, just as the CNet article is being published, Li'l Dandelion manages to make his website implode by turning down free hosting so he can put up a bunch of ads. His plan to monetize the blog on extremely short notice backfired. Itsallgood!

Nigel's Guest Blogger said...

It wasn't me, unfortunately (or fortunately) my looser w-2 job has kept me busy and distracted from the important stuff the past couple weeks.

I am extremely pissed that while reading Flails blog I noticed the SWAB was on Meebo and I failed to get a chat to him before he left.

Nigel's Guest Blogger said...

For the record, looser w-2 jobs really put a damper on my creativity.

Legion said...

@Ogg
I'd have to disagree, I've seen many people who didn't know what they were doing (One episode with the java jockey who decides to go into real estate comes to mind, or how about the couple with the guy that quit his job to go into it fulltime, last scene was both of them sitting in an empty open house when their neighbor who is also trying to sell her house tells them in a 1 mile radius there are about 100 houses for sale, and the best, the best, is the 'psychic' dumbass who painted her house puke yellow. Yeah, the house told her to do that), as most of them just did it for the money, and did a half assed job on it most of the time as they didn't want to lose any profits. Yeah, I'd love to be living in one of those houses with the half assed on the cheap workmanship.

Oh remember the Moffits? Ha ha they have like a 700 sq foot 'mansion' that they were trying to sell for like 800K. The bitchy wife even remarked when they were behind schedule "What are we gonna do, pull another 5 grand in mortgage payments out of our ass?" Must be a female entitled thing with their thinking that money comes out of asses.

The Original Kevin™ said...

Legion - OGG is talking about Flip This House on A&E, you are talking about Flip That House on TLC.

Arthur Wankspittle said...

Talking of pictures, is it me or is Casey looking a bit worn and old?
Casey

Anonymous said...

Arthur-

Yes, I agree he does look different than the early Hawaii photos.

Lost Cause said...

The hair on the chinny chin chin is an accomplishment.

Jean Valjean said...

TOK:

I believe the "pull another 5 grand out of our ass" show that Legion mentioned was actually "Property Ladder"

The Original Kevin™ said...

You're right!

Anonymous said...

http://www.mccullagh.org/photo/1ds-16/casey-serin-jetta

They seem to not be concerned about privacy in this photo...

LOL said...

RE Casey, he is looking pale and thin, reminds me of Willy Wonka (Johnny Depp version) with that hair.

ratlab said...

@Ogg

Didn't Duane LeGate make some comment on how the Sam guy from the Atlanta Flip This House had a shady past? Looks like he was spot on.

And the Melina woman from the Montelongo clan in San Antonio's shows is rather good looking. Heels and low-cut tops are mandatory every time they "help" the painters.

lawnmower man said...

I like these two additional entries in the Casey Poseable Action Figure collection.

"Just look natural, Casey."

Casey slings the murse around his neck, pushes it around to the small of his back, and adopts what he believes is a tough-guy pose: legs apart, hands deep in pockets, eyes narrowed against the Sacramento sun. "Like this?"

"Yeah, I guess that'll do, kid."

Anonymous said...

Nigel says "HeeKee" is a nice guy in meatspace. But Camp Idiot appears to be a StormFront message board. It is full of anti-semitic and real racist diatribes, with two message boards devoted to those topics exclusively.

Rob Dawg said...

Didn't Duane LeGate make some comment on how the Sam guy from the Atlanta Flip This House had a shady past? Looks like he was spot on.

Duane has been at least as out in front of identifying these shenanigans as any dawgged blogger. He seems to be all the things these others can't claim as to knowledge, expertise and performance in an industry that isn't all bad.

lawnmower man said...

IAFF aside: am I right in thinking that Casey added "almost-guaranteed roulette strategy" to his list at some point after the post was published?

It reeks of hater bait, especially given the bet-it-all-on-black jokes and speculation around his Tahoe trip.

Trolling's not going to work for him any more, now that he's acknowledged he's done it. It's like Disneyland with the lights on: once the mechanics of the ride are revealed, it stops being fun.

flailing forward said...

Ok, if it wasn't NGB, I'm gonna guess either Fear the Murse or 0 Comment Swaby.

Dolph said...

I agree Dawg, Duane is a pretty upfront and easily accessible guy.

I have exchanged emails with him and I can honestly say he is a pretty good guy. Hindsight is proving that Duane was trying to be a voice of reason with Casey and it failed (as usual).

lawnmower man said...

@Anon 10:15AM: Nigel says "HeeKee" is a nice guy in meatspace.

Yep. For someone so concerned with respectful commenting, Nigel sure does choose some strange bedfellows.

CampIdiot is a festering cesspool, but it gets a "nice guy really" pass from Nigel.

I've commented several times at DHC suggesting that Nigel's associations are actually damaging to him, but he's promptly deleted me each time. So it goes.

Anonymous said...

Lawnmower:

I've made those comments as well. How come Nigel is such a fucking twat with zero credibility? THIS is why I believe he is RCS. He dismisses CI yet works hand in hand with it's owner. He says he's not RCS yet all signs point to otherwise.

Anonymous said...

I looked up Nigel's Mortgage Lender Agent info at the Utah Division of Real Estate!
http://realestate.utah.gov/database/mortgage_individuals1.xls

6034495-MLAF Mortgage Lender Agent SWABY NIGEL Active 5/24/2006 5/31/2008 03/25/2006 INTEGRITY FIRST FINANCIAL, INC 5494443-MLCO

Looks like he's working for "INTEGRITY FIRST FINANCIAL" license number "5494443-MLCO".

EVERYONE GO AND COMPLAIN TO THE UTAH DIVISION OF REAL ESTATE ABOUT HIS LITTLE WEBSITE! LET'S TAKE HIM DOWN TO CHINA TOWN!

Anonymous said...

http://realestate.utah.gov/complaint.html

How to Submit a Complaint
The Utah Division of Real Estate has regulatory jurisdiction over appraisers, residential mortgage lenders, real estate brokers and agents; and salespeople for subdivisions, timeshares, and camp resorts. The Division’s jurisdiction over mortgage lenders is limited to the origination of residential, retail, first mortgages. Banks, credit unions, loan-servicing, and second mortgages are regulated by the Department of Financial Institutions.

The Division does not have jurisdiction over homeowner associations, providers of nightly lodging, landlord/tenant disputes, contract disputes, or monetary damages.

The Division uses complaints to regulate licensees, not to mediate or resolve professional or personal disputes. If you believe you have a legal claim for monetary damages, you should consult an attorney about pursuing a civil lawsuit.

If you have a complaint relating to the honesty and competency of one of the Division’s licensees, please complete the form below and submit your complaint to the Division by fax, mail or in person. Please also submit all documentation that supports the complaint.

Complaint Form

NoDebtWhatSoEver™ said...

@lawnmower man: yeah, the roulette item is definitely a post-publish addition.

Ogg the Caveman said...

@ The Original Kevin:

Legion was replying to a post where I'd compared the two shows.

@ Legion:

or how about the couple with the guy that quit his job to go into it fulltime, last scene was both of them sitting in an empty open house...

Newlyweds, right? That one hurt to watch, honestly. Nice people if more than a little bit clueless, and they're starting off in life with bankruptcy and a probable divorce in their near future.

I'm all for personal responsibility and I would never support bailing such people out, but I can't take pleasure in their demise. At some point we have to recognize that our society with its materialism, get-rich-quick emphasis, and yes shows like "Flip (This|That) House" play a role in fucking these people over. In a sane world they'd still be plugging away at their looser W2 jobs, starting a family, and working toward a home of their own.

Folks like Casey are doomed no matter what, but some folks are in trouble who would've been ok had our culture not helped steer them in the wrong direction.

Anonymous said...

Funny how CI has unflattering comments about Nigel but it's an okay place because Heekee is nice.

Nigel admits T/Nacho is a nice person yet won't remove her photos. I guess the lesson here is Heekee provides Nigel with something he can make a buck from and despite CI he's so nice! Funny how he doesn't use his bizarre logic to figure out that not all of us realists are bad people. He's deluded and just plain dumb.

Anonymous said...

Here's the website for his company:

http://integrityloans.com/aboutus.aspx

BelowTheCrowd said...

Here's the reality of "reality" TV:

'Extreme Makeover': Feel-good TV becomes a courtroom drama

And more reality:

Family says show built facade after wrecking house

And some tragic reality:

Reality show leads to suicide

I like M. Singh said...

BelowTheCrowd:

Interesting links, thanks. Do you know those people that are so proud they don't watch any TV? You will ask them, 'Did you see 24 last night?', and instead of just saying 'no', they say, 'I don't watch TV.'

I have a nice TV, a good SONY HDTV, which has been unplugged for 6 weeks now. Originally I was going to redo the wiring rats nest that had developed, but became sidetracked, and haven't felt compelled to reassemble the cabling since. I know there is good TV, I have rented Oz and West Wing and others on DVD. And, I watch

---- ack, where was I going with that.

You suck, Casey.

Anonymous said...

Terrible just terrible. I have done all of it a little bit: changing name servers, domain ttls, parking domains, moving domains, moving mysql dbs, restoring backups, selecting hosting cmpnys....

There is no excuse for all casey's trouble. he is not good at 'IT'. Use a header viewer and see what his site returns now:

HTTP/1.x 200 OK
Date: Tue, 15 May 2007 18:28:38 GMT
Server: Apache/2.0.52 (CentOS)
X-Powered-By: PHP/4.3.9
Content-Length: 0
Connection: close

i don't think casey could keep a 50K job... his writing is not good enough for content creation, his designing is not notable enough in comparison with glut of degreed graphic designers or persons with actual talent, his coding skills are nearly non-existent ("maybe I can trick someone into coding a little PHP"), and his 'infrastructure' skills, as shown by his site's uptime, are abysmal.

Anonymous said...

www.iamfacingforeclosure.com. A 66.40.8.164

"You have successfully set up your website! This is the default server page. There are a few possible reasons why you see this page instead of your own:
[...]
If you are not the owner of the website, please access this page later."

Legion said...

@Ogg and The original Kevin

Yeah I was talking about ALL those shows, I used to watch them a lot too which is what I was trying to convey to Ogg.
Unlike Ogg though, I did derive some pleasure from watching them crash and burn

1. Sometimes they would have their consultant (that 'expert' female) that would give them pretty decent advice regarding what to do, what not to change, and how to maximize their profit, and most of those peeps would just look at her like "Ummm, I'm the budding real estate mogul here lady, and I'm the one that the banks are lending money to" and pretty much ignore her completely and spend too much on upgrades. Sounds a little familiar right?

2. Most of these people were WAAAAAY over their heads when it came to buying a house. I mean, the java jockey who prolly makes 20 K per year bought a 400K house I think. Of course his credit was ruined by the end, not to mention his rents who he borrowed money from got screwed as well.

3. A lot of them proved to be lazy and incompetent. Remember that dual couple that bought the million dollar home and ended up breaking even (or so they say). One of the husbands ended up doing all the work, and the wife of the other one shows up and demands "I want this house finished now, you hear me, now!" Then she trotted off to take care of her kid. Give me a break. Must be nice to just demand things and expect it to just happen. (Her husband was off on business and I think chipped in like day)

4. When they saw their profits dwindling (They all thought they could make 100K for 8 weeks work), most of them went on the cheap and did shoddy work. Screw the greater fool became their motto.

5. Most of them thought it 'neat' to be able to call themselves real estate investors. The Moffitts once again comes to mind. Big brother would just walk in now and then glaring and looking concerned that not much had been done, while his poor brother who moved across state lines with a family to join his real estate ventures ended up being screamed at by Brother one's wife for not getting everything done quickly enough. ALL of them had dreams of creating a business flipping houses, and most of them failed on their first attempt. Not in the beginning though, when real estate was going up anyway and could compensate for all the mistakes the newer guys did.


But hey, at least they dared to dream...blah blah blah....

Ogg the Caveman said...

Hell, I can call myself a real estate investor. I've got a little spot in Scotland.

Anonymous said...

"Nigel says "HeeKee" is a nice guy in meatspace. But Camp Idiot appears to be a StormFront message board. It is full of anti-semitic and real racist diatribes, with two message boards devoted to those topics exclusively."

heekee is actually a nice guy, but he is a big believer in free speech so the heekee.com message board is attempting to walk a fine line between free speech and censorship of "spam"

lawnmower man said...

Oh, what absolute cobblers. Free speech does not extend to hate speech: in what universe are posts titled "should it be legal to rape jew women?" or "Niggers invented peanut butter!", to take two examples posted today, defensible?

There's no "fine line" being walked there. CampIdiot is a cesspit and Nigel's association with its proprietor dirties his hands enormously.

Aspeth said...

There's a good point with the shoddy worksmanship/flipper thing. In looking at a bunch of two- and four-fam prop's lately, the vast majority are obviously DIY "improved" with shitty IKEA/Home Depot Expo pieces.

Their listing agents hate to hear it when I say that I'd shave the cost of removing and repairing their bullshit work from the asking price. That usually means ripping out the cheap countertops, lopsided tiles, kitchen layouts where appliances block cabinets/doors, and awful trendy paint colors.

You can almost smell the flipper fever in those places. And they're deluded enough to think that, because they overpaid and overimproved, I'm going to buy at a price that benefits them. HA!

Anonymous said...

lawnmower man,

So if it is offensive it should not be allowed?

Is that your definition of free speech?

Anonymous said...

CAMP IDIOT IS JUST LIKE THE DREAM i HAD LAST NIGHT WHERE i WAS IN THIS BEAUTIFUL PARK IN THE SUMMERTIME AND i WAS SEDUCING A 14 YEAR OLD tRISHA nIXON. mY THUMPING BIG HARDON WAS TWITCHING AS i RUBBED THE BABY SKINNED TIP AGAINST MY SOFT WARM SHEETS, IN THE DEEP SLUMBERING DELUSION THAT i WAS PENETRATING HER VIRGINAL BIRTH CANAL, IN ALL ITS SUGARY PINK TENDERNESS FOR THE FIRST TIME...

gOD hOW i WOULD HAVE LOVED TO HAVE DRAINED MY BALLS OF THEIR STICKY HOT FUC, OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN, INTO THE DELICATE TISSUES OF HER INNERMOST BEING LIKE SOME SAVAGE OVERSEXED BOXER DOG...MY MIND REELS AT THE THOUGH OF THE DELIQUESCENCE OF MY STICKY, GLUTINOUS, CREAMY WHITE SEMINAL FLUIDS WITH HER FRAGRANT VAGINAL SECRETIONS...

Aspeth said...

What kind of sex offender is capable of simultaneously penning juvenile masturbation posts while referencing a Nixon daughter?

It's the stuff of a Dateline episode.

lawnmower man said...

So if it is offensive it should not be allowed? Is that your definition of free speech?

Not just my definition, my anonymous pal; try the Supreme Court's definitions. There are a number of established limitations to free speech, as protected by the First Amendment, including but not limited to hate speech and libel.

Do a little research before spouting off the "but free speech means I can say nigger!" argument. The Annotated Constitution, at Cornell Law School, is a good place to start.

flailing forward said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
flailing forward said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
flailing forward said...

I deleted my comments because I realized I don't know enough about Heekee one way or the other to say anything.

BelowTheCrowd said...

Yo, I Like M. Singh,

I do know people like that.

Personally, I also have a Sony HDTV capable set, and while it hasn't been unplugged for the past six weeks, it often might as well be. Unlike the ones you speak of, I don't make a big deal of it. Life's too short to make everything into a point of argument or an attempt at being superior (Which I'm definitely not. Just because I don't watch much TV doesn't mean I don't waste time in plenty of other ways).

I watched one episode of "Survivor" when it first came out because I had some small illusion that there might be some small bit of something that might be interesting or useful to me. (At the time I was a guide, I have worked with wilderness SAR organizations in the past, and am certified in wilderness medicine.)

Of course, there is nothing of use to anybody who might find themselves in a real survival situation, just as there is probably very little in any of the "housing" reality shows that has much utility to a real estate professional, or anything in Trump's show that you would really use in managing an actual business.

In the end, all these shows are nothing but more elaborate and well-produced versions of what we used to call "game shows."

With one exception (an old guy who was an ex marine, I think), everybody on that original "survivor" programs I saw would probably be dead inside a week. Not because they neeed to be, but because they were too stupid and egomaniacal to do what they needed to in order to save themselves.

-btc